Category Archives: mediation

Mediation and Horse Whispering

Early in my mediation training, a mediation trainer played a video of a horse whisperer.  Mediation is much like horse whispering, she explained.  I have been pondering her message for years. Fast forward to 2011.  If you haven’t, I highly recommend … Continue reading

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iPad Mediators

Have you ever been in a mediation and the damn mediator is working harder on his iPad than on your case?  Erg.  This is not the first time I have heard this complaint.  I have a friend who recently had … Continue reading

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Working With the “Crazy Ones” in Mediation

Steve Jobs encouraged us to celebrate “the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the trouble-makers, the round pegs in the square holes, the ones who see things differently.” As mediators, we often meet these so-called “crazy ones.”  They are involved … Continue reading

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HOA Boards: Mediation vs. Arbitration?

You find yourself on a community association board.  Homeowners are complaining about leaking roofs, damaged walls and soggy carpet.  The board’s attorney has filed a lawsuit against the roofer.  The roofer sued the general contractor and the developer who both … Continue reading

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Shift to Professional Mediators vs. Diplomats in Warring Countries? Cool.

Great news.  Foreign governments are promoting professional private mediators as an effective method of resolving world conflicts.  They actually recognize the value of professional mediators working to resolve conflicts  rather than diplomats.  Private mediators lack the political baggage that diplomats … Continue reading

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Millenials: Ignore Adults and Lose Your Self in Something

Millenials:  Ignore what adults are saying about you.  It is unhelpful.  Go out and be individuals and lose yourself in something.  I like that message from David Brooks in his recent column, “It’s Not About You.”   I can identify with it. … Continue reading

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Who Should Suggest Mediation?

I have often been asked whether an attorney shows weakness if the attorney suggests mediation.  In 1998, when I began mediating, this was a frequent concern.  Fortunately, at that time, I was the Chief Appellate Mediator at the Utah Court … Continue reading

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Reading Emotions: Fear and Lying

We interpret body language and emotions through our own lens.  What assumptions do we make?  Are the assumptions accurate?  I learned that many of the common American beliefs about body language are inaccurate. What we do know is that people … Continue reading

Posted in Body Language, Difficult People, Emotion Recognition, Emotions, Lying, mediation, Mediation Advocacy | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

A New Tool for Working With Difficult People

High emotion is a standard part of mediation.  Clients and lawyers both can be emotional.  Working with these emotions effectively can save time in mediation, money over the long haul for the parties, and aggravation for clients and their families … Continue reading

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Negotiating with Difficult People, Lying and Apology

I am lucky.  Every 6 months for the last 10 years, I have been fortunate enough to attend excellent seminars for commercial mediators on really interesting topics.  Next week the International Academy of Mediators will meet in Napa Valley, California … Continue reading

Posted in Apology, Difficult People, Emotions, law, Lying, mediation, Settlement, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment